Emergency exit books drama comedy script buy online
Light on a couple, about to leave. He puts on his coat. She takes out a cigarette.
Her (enthusiastic) – So…?
Him (categorical) – Crap.
Her (shocked) – Crap ?
Him – Load of crap.
Her – You didn’t understand anything, then ?
Him – There was something to understand ?
Her – Oh, yes, of course…
Him (looking at her) – Of course what ?
Her – You get your revenge…
Him – What revenge…?
Her – This time I liked it, then you don’t… That’s really mean, don’t you think ?
Him – Wait, I didn’t like it, that’s all ! I’m not going to tell you that I liked it just to please you !
Her – You didn’t say that you didn’t like it, you said that it was crap. It’s not exactly the same !
Him – Well, I don’t really see the difference…
Her – It was crap, I liked it, so I am crap.
Him – You said it…
Her – I didn’t say it, Plato did.
Him – Plato says that you’re crap ?
Her – It’s called a syllogism. All women are mortal, I am a woman, so I am mortal.
Him – If Plato says so, then… As far as I am concerned, I just said that I found this thing dead boring. (After a while) Besides, I’m not even sure that your syllogism stands up.
Her – That’s right, go on…
Him – But… what did you like ?
Her – Everything !
Him – That’s rather vague, isn’t it ?
Her – What did you not like ?
Him – Well, I’d rather not get into details. You’ll get upset again…
Her – Me, upset ? Wait, I don’t care you didn’t like ! I liked it, that’s all. I feel sorry for you if you were bored…
Silence.
Him – We’re not going to argue about that, are we ?
Her – Sometimes, I wonder what we’re doing together…
He takes her gently by the shoulder.
Him – Come on…
Her – Next time, I hope we will both like it…
Him – Or at least that we will agree…
She looks at him.
Him – We might both get bored.
Her – Well yes… It’s a minimalist idea of harmony…
They leave. Dark.